Some days I want to stop
posting
I want to stop responding
Some days I want to pretend
that I don’t see
that I don’t know
what’s going on
But the call of
peace
the call of
justice
Is so loud
that even on ‘some days’
I cannot ignore it
Rejection
I started the new year off with a few rejection letters. Job and wriitng rejections are no strangers to me, neither are the rejections of unrequited love or of unwanted friendship. Last year was full of tons of rejection. I expect my future will be full of it as well. Although I am not immune to feelings of inadequacy, starting the new year in this way did not come with a sense of failure. Instead I was reminded of all the things that I tried last year and all of my pursuits. Last year was a journey to know myself better and to accept who I am. It was a journey in vulnerability. In that vulnerability I realized that rejection doesn’t mean failure and that it doesn’t have to crush my dreams. Those letters of rejection meant that I didn’t let fear stop me from pursuing something that I wanted. So I read not with dissappoinment but with a sense of triumph.
Rejection neither
friend nor an undoing of
my identity
Resolutions
- Acknowledge fears: work to move past them
- 2016 mantra: success is nothing to fear
- Work through own guilt, be there for friends and family but they must also work through their own guilt and fears. You can’t own theirs and yours
- Run exercise as much as you want too!
- Write more
- Visit friends, especially those you haven’t seen in awhile.
- Continue to be present in all aspects of your life
- Let go and let loose a little more!
- Learn fun and interesting things
- Continue to evolve 😉
- Remember that there is value in both the future and the past, so it is okay to let go of old memories, relationships  and experiences to make room for new memories, relationships and experiences.
A Re-Telling
a re-telling of my story
to myself and
to others
a re-telling of my story
that includes all of
the joy, the love and acceptance
that includes all of
the fun, benefit, blessing and advantages
that I experienced and still experience
breaking out from under
the clouds of trauma and despair
that I let others convince
me, that I convinced myself to
believe was my story
a re-telling of my story
Sometimes
Sometimes I get lost but
I find my way back, wading
Through uncertainty
A garden story
A piece of kale planted a year ago thrives in our garden. Not deterred by cold or frost. Waiting for a little girl who gathers a handful to take to her family. She munches on a leaf and shows her dad, the bundle of leaves she planted a year ago. Not at all surprised that her garden has survived.
My CommunityÂ
My community
bleeds through
my soul
It is not bond by
geographic walls
It is not bond by
family ties
My community seeps
through my soul
It is not confining
It is uplifting
My community
is everlasting
My community
is endless
My community is not bond
by hate or fear
My community is love
Post Parenting Reflections
This month is the anniversary of my fathers death. I probably have this idealized view of what it is like to have parents. But when I imagine them I think of people who would tell me what to do, let me know when I am doing something stupid, and who also offer unsolicited advice on my life choices without regard to hurting my feelings. Just real truth. I love it when people are nice to me and praise me but I think missed out on the emotional damage that I’m told parents can cause😉.
My time
My time knows no bonds
My time, my priceless gift to you
My time equals my love
Myth of Shyness
Reserved and reflective
Observant active
Participant
Struggling to overcome
Assumptions of shyness
Struggling to overcome
Assumptions
Of passiveness
Reserved and reflective
Observant and active
Participant in life
D.S. Hollie 